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How to Reconnect With Nature When You Live an Ordinary Life

Oct 30
8 min read
How to Reconnect With Nature When You Live an Ordinary Life watercolour image of a woman with her hand on a large tree

There is a tree I have passed many times without knowing anything about it.


For a long while it existed in the same way that lampposts and fences exist: part of the arrangement of a familiar place, registered just enough that I would probably have noticed if it disappeared. I could not have told you when its leaves arrived or whether birds nested there. I don't think I had ever properly looked at its bark. It was simply a tree beside a road I travelled often. Then, for no particular reason, I began noticing it.


At first there was nothing remarkable to see. It was not ancient or enormous, and nobody had placed a sign nearby explaining its significance. But familiarity began doing something that spectacle could not. I saw the tree on enough different days that change became visible. New growth appeared. The shape of its shadow moved. There were mornings when birds occupied its branches and afternoons when it seemed completely still. Weather passed through it. Seasons altered it in increments so small that no single visit could have revealed them.


Eventually it stopped being a tree and became that tree. I think this is where much of our relationship with the natural world begins.


We often imagine that reconnecting with nature requires us to go somewhere. The phrase itself seems to suggest a journey towards a place from which we have become separated: a forest, perhaps, or a mountain, a beach with nobody else on it. We picture ourselves stepping away from roads and buildings and entering something wilder, as though nature begins at the point where human life becomes less visible.


I understand the longing. There are landscapes that rearrange something inside us simply because of their scale, places where the world seems suddenly larger and our own lives briefly become smaller within it. I hope we continue protecting such places, visiting them and allowing ourselves to be astonished by them. But most of us cannot live perpetually in the wilderness.


We live ordinary lives in ordinary places, and if nature is something we can encounter only when we escape them, then our relationship with the living world will always depend upon leaving home. I believe there is another way.


Nature Is Not Somewhere Else


The division between nature and ordinary life is a strange one when you begin to examine it. A bird does not become less wild because it lands on a television aerial instead of a branch. Rain falling into a suburban gutter belongs to the same weather system that moves across forests and mountains. The moon above a supermarket car park is not a lesser moon than the one reflected in a remote lake, although one setting may make it considerably easier to remember to look up.


Nature has not withdrawn from our ordinary lives. Much of the time, we have simply become accustomed to its presence.


I notice this most clearly with birds. When I arrive somewhere unfamiliar, I hear them immediately because the sounds are new. A call I don't recognise seems to demand attention, and I find myself looking for the creature responsible. At home, the birds can become part of the background. Their voices are woven so completely into the sound of the place that I can move through an entire morning without consciously hearing them. The birds have not become quieter. I have become familiar enough to stop listening.


There is something both sad and hopeful in this because familiarity can make the world invisible, but it can also become the doorway through which we begin to know it. The difference is attention.


You don't necessarily need a larger garden, a house in the countryside or a free weekend to begin paying attention. You need somewhere you encounter often enough for repetition to reveal what a single visit cannot. That place may not look like anybody's idea of wilderness. It may simply be home.


Reconnect with Nature Knowing One Small Place


There is a particular kind of knowledge that can only be acquired by returning. You can visit a magnificent landscape once and remember it for the rest of your life, but there are things the landscape will never have the opportunity to tell you. You will not know what appears there after three days of rain, which birds arrive at a certain time of year or how different the same patch of ground looks when the light changes in winter. To know those things, you have to come back.


This is why I think one of the simplest ways to reconnect with nature is not to seek more of it, but to choose less. One place. One tree, perhaps.


Imagine noticing the same tree for a year. At first you might know almost nothing about it. You may not even know its name, and I don't think that matters. Identification can deepen our understanding of the world, but knowledge does not always have to begin with naming. Before you know what something is called, you can know how it looks.


You can notice the pattern of its bark and the shape of its leaves. You can see where the first new growth appears and which side receives the afternoon sun. After rain, the trunk may become almost another colour. A bird might favour one particular branch. Then one day something changes.


You walk past and realise the tree is flowering. You have seen flowering trees thousands of times, but this feels slightly different because you remember when this one wasn't. You know what the branches looked like last week. The flowers are no longer a general sign that the season is changing; they belong to a sequence you have been watching unfold.


This is the beginning of relationship. Not ownership. Not mastery. Simply the gradual accumulation of attention. The tree has been living its life beside yours all along. You have finally begun to notice.


We Don't Have to Know Everything


Sometimes I think our desire to understand nature can accidentally become another reason not to begin. There is so much we don't know.


A person who knows birds can hear a call and immediately name the species. Someone who understands plants can walk through a patch of vegetation that looks green and indistinguishable to everybody else and see dozens of separate lives. Once you become aware of that knowledge, it is easy to feel how much of the world you have been walking past without understanding.


But not knowing the name of a bird does not prevent you from noticing that it returns to the same fence every morning. Curiosity can come before expertise. In fact, I think there is something lovely about allowing it to.


You notice something because it has become interesting to you, and only then, perhaps, do you want to know more. You might eventually discover what the bird is called, where it goes when you no longer see it or why its behaviour changes at a certain time of year. The information now has somewhere to belong because it is attached to a creature you have already encountered rather than being another fact about the natural world in general. Knowledge becomes intimate.


This is very different from feeling that we ought to know the names of things in order to prove that we are properly connected to nature. There is no examination. You are allowed to look at a cloud without identifying it. You can admire a moth without knowing what kind it is. You can spend years loving a tree before discovering its name. Wonder does not require credentials. Sometimes attention is enough.


The Landscape of an Ordinary Life


I think one reason we overlook nearby nature is that we have learned to associate beauty with destination. We travel to see certain landscapes because they are extraordinary, and rightly so. But a place does not need to be extraordinary to become meaningful.


There is a stretch of ground near almost every home that would be completely uninteresting to somebody passing through it once. Perhaps it is the edge of a park or the path taken while walking the dog. Nothing there announces itself as important. There is no viewpoint at the end and no reason somebody would travel across the country to see it. Walk there often enough, however, and the place begins acquiring history.


One morning there is water where the ground is usually dry. Weeks later you notice how long it has been since rain. The light begins reaching a section of the path that spent winter in shadow. Something flowers and then disappears. A fallen branch remains beside the path long enough that you stop thinking of it as something that has recently fallen.


None of these changes would necessarily matter to a visitor. They matter because you remember what came before them.


This is one of the quiet gifts of staying with a place. We begin to see not only what is there, but what has changed. The landscape gains a past. And somewhere within that process, we gain one there too.


This is why the places we know deeply can become so difficult to describe to other people. Their meaning is rarely contained in their most impressive features. It lives in accumulated encounters: the corner where we once sheltered from sudden rain, the tree that flowers earlier than the others, the particular section of path where the first warm evening of the year was noticed.


A photograph might show the place perfectly and still fail to explain why it matters. Relationship is difficult to photograph. It is built slowly, through return.


Becoming Part of the Place


There are many beautiful ways to spend more time outside, but I am not sure we need to turn nature into another practice we perform correctly.


We do not need to count minutes or measure how successfully an afternoon outdoors has improved us. We don't have to come home calmer than when we left. Sometimes the wind is annoying. Sometimes mosquitoes find us before wonder does. Sometimes the walk is ordinary from beginning to end.


The natural world does not exist to make us better people. It is simply the world we are already living within. This is why reconnecting with nature begins when we stop asking it to provide an experience and begin allowing ourselves to become familiar with it instead.


Choose somewhere close enough that returning requires almost no effort. Then return. Because most of what is happening cannot be understood in a single visit. Notice one thing. See whether it is still there next time.


There is a tree beside a road that I once passed without seeing. It has not grown into a wilderness and the road beside it has not disappeared. Cars still pass. Life continues around it. But now, when I see it, there is recognition. I know something about what it looked like before. And I want to see what happens next.


This is what it means to reconnect with nature when you live an ordinary life. Not escaping the ordinary world in search of somewhere wild enough to deserve our attention, but looking closely enough at the place where we already are that it stops feeling ordinary.


The world was never empty of nature. We were already standing inside it.


Continue with The Lost Art of Slow Living


The Lost Art of Slow Living by Julie Ann - Fee Download

If this way of thinking about everyday life feels familiar, The Lost Art of Slow Living is a free 50-page illustrated book-a-zine about noticing more, living a little more slowly and rediscovering life beyond the screen.





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